By: May Rostom
For years and years you’ve been hearing about “how to woo a girl” and reading up on “how to ask a girl out” but nobody sat you down and gave you the 101 on what NOT to say after you’ve gotten the girl. Apart from the dead obvious “your feet smell” or “what’s wrong with your hair?!”, believe it or not, there are a few more things we do not appreciate hearing. No matter how “honest” or “blunt” you may be, trust me on this, keep it to yourself! Here are 10 things you don’t wanna say to any woman. Ever!
1. You look fat in this: Even if you think she looks like a polar bear in that outfit, never ever voice it! The woman has a mirror at home, tried her best to look good for you, and even probably thought she looked fat in that outfit, but the last thing she needs is you telling her you think she’s fat.
2. She’s hot: I believe it goes without saying, never tell your girl you think someone else is hot EVEN IF SHE ASKED. It’s okay to keep it to yourself and joke about it with the boys, but with her just look away and sink in your chair.
3. Women can’t drive: As much as this comes off as a plain and simple fact to guys, but every woman likes to think she’s unlike all other women. If you didn’t die while sitting in the passenger seat next to her, don’t tell her she can’t drive, you’re alive aren’t you?
4. Calm Down: Those two words here will stir up hell in your face mister! Just don’t!
5. I like you as a friend: I know that it’s necessary to sometimes “friendzone” a girl that’s crushing on you badly, but don’t give us the F word please (also read Friend)! Just think of something else to say, lie, throw a cupcake at us, but not the F word! As much as you hate to be friendzoned, we hate it ten times more!
6. You’re such a drama queen: OH NO YOU DIDN’T! OMG! DID YOU JUST SAY THAT?!
7. Do you mind if I kiss you: Why are you asking? Is this the first time you two meet? Unless you’re some weirdo that walks up to girls at the bar and asks them for a kiss, don’t say that. Girls like to be swept off their feet, they like surprises and spontaneity, if you feel like kissing her, grab her arm and pull her towards you and just kiss the woman! Avoid the forehead please, it’s insulting!
8. Are you PMSing again: It’s fine to say that if she actually is and it’s that time of the month, but what if it’s not? Are you implying that she’s being a crazy B****?
9. No offence: 110% of the time everything that’s said after these two words is taken with offence so be careful.
10. Nothing: Saying nothing is the worst of them all… Being silent or just passive about things that matter is the worst thing you can do ever! If we ask you your opinion in something we’re wearing, saying nothing means you hate it. If we ask you if you think we look fat, saying nothing means you think we’re polar bears. Got it?